5 Things We All Struggle With

It’s no secret that being human comes with complications and serious shit majority of the time. Regardless of how old or young you are, mature or immature, wise or missing a few screws, we all struggle with things that often prevent us from progressing in the way that we should. Below I listed five major things that most people struggle with.

  1. Walking away from people or things. This one is massive in todays youth simply because walking away is hard. I struggle with this personally regardless of what it is that I need to walk away from, I hesitate or question my decision. The different instances in which most struggle with I have listed below (read what applies to you).

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  • Walking away from a relationship– This sucks for the simple fact you’ve invested so much time into building and getting to know a person and ultimately working towards being together. However just because you’ve spend a year or six months trying to figure out someone, does not require you to spend the rest of your days crying in the bathroom. Whenever a significant other makes you feel small or insignificant then it is time to do some evaluating. If a situation is toxic and no longer produce good results then it is time to walk away. Con’s and pro’s list (we all have one) should not define your relationship but if the con’s out weigh the good by far, ask yourself, “is this healthy?” Put yourself first in order to achieve best results. These results may not stem overnight but knowing that you value yourself enough becomes a bigger reward in the end.
  • Walking away from a job– Who doesn’t love money?! However, working at a job you absolutely despite causes more harm than good. It is absolutely impossible to put your best foot forward when you don’t love what you are waking up every morning to do. Whether it is the environment, coworkers, or your manager no amount of pep talks can help you fake a smile. Do yourself a favor and leave. Find a new job and be serious about it. Finding a good environment to be in is crucial simply because it is healthy to be in. We all struggle with landing the jobs that we really want, but have you honestly tried? Check out my previous post with some helpful tips on how to land that job here.
  • Walking away from a toxic friendship– It sucks when you realize the awful truth about a person whom you thought was your friend. After spending years or a few months revealing your most painful or embarrassing secrets, getting to know each other, and so fourth, it is sad when that person does not have your best interest at heart. We have all encountered that one “friend” who made you feel bad about yourself, embarrassed you, or simply isn’t there when you need them most. Ask yourself is this really worth the stress? A true friend adds to your life in more ways than one. Do not be afraid to evaluate the friendship and cut ties. A person like this usually won’t even notice when you distance yourself from them because of how self evolved they are. Be nice about it and never stoop to their level.

2. Being Happy. We always ask ourselves are we happy and more times than often the answer is no or maybe. What dictates happiness is often our shallowness and being hard on yourself. Just because you don’t own that Beemer yet does not mean you’re not happy. Ask yourself about the things you do have that you are grateful for. You may not have landed that dream job yet but you sure are on your way. Remind yourself of the opportunities you’ve been given and be happy. Happiness is not tangible and it should never be for the simple fact that anything tangible could be gone tomorrow.

3. Confidence. Every morning we wake up, look in the mirror and obsess over something about our bodies. STOP IT! Embrace the flaws you have or work on it. Stop comparing yourself to the Instagram model with one thousand likes because photoshop is a real thing. What makes you beautiful is confidence. Love yourself enough to know your worth and how beautiful you are.

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4. Learning how to handle stress. Stress is inevitable. When one thing goes wrong we panic and drive ourselves further into the deep end. Regardless of how big or small your situation is, stressing will not help you. Sit down and evaluate the situation first. Next think of solutions that are available to you. Ladies stress causes wrinkles!!! At the end of the day adulting comes with responsibilities that doesn’t always go as smooth as we would like, but stressing will not make it go away; a clear mind does.

5. Change. Who likes change? Most likely no one does and that’s okay. What’s not okay is not excepting the things that changes. Life evolves everyday and due to that, comes change no matter how big or small. The best way to handle change is to embrace it. Think about how much change and growth has helped you blossom into the amazing person you are today. Would you want to be five years old forever? Maybe we’d say yes to the part of having no responsibilities but realistically speaking, No! Struggling with change is harder for some people and I understand it is always easier said than done, but change is good and opportunities need change in order to prosper.

Of the list of things that people struggle with daily, I believe the listed are the most often overlooked. All you can do is continue to live the life you were meant to live one day at a time.

I want to know what struggles you face daily and how you’ve made it work for you!

 

 

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10 Ways to Dress up Your Favorite T-shirt

We all have that one t-shirt that we love beyond measures. If you are anything like me, you have one favorite t-shirt that you want to wear everyday but can’t because lets face it, it would be painfully obvious. Over time I have made it my mission to find alternate ways of wearing items in my closet multiple times with a few fashion tweaks here and there. Unless you are a Kardashian, buying new clothes every week so you do not have to repeat your clothes is simply not realistic.

The most common item that people are caught being “repeat offenders” would be t-shirts. Being comfortable often takes the lead when it comes to style and what better way to display that other than in a t-shirt? I find myself wanting to be comfortable in anything I wear these days the older I get. Another fact, t-shirts are the most versatile piece of clothing that most people own. This post will be dedicated to showing ten different ways to spruce up that t-shirt and how to make it perfectly expectable to wear to any event.

  1. My favorite go-to: BLAZERS! Any color blazer can take any basic tee to chic. Don’t be afraid to play with colors and textures.

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2. Wear it tucked in with a statement belt. 

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3. Add Heels. 

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4. Statement bottoms

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5. Adding statement jewelry to any look is key, especially to any t-shirt.

6. Change the look of any tee by rolling up the sleeves or by tying a knot at the bottom.

7. Add Sneakers.

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8. Don’t be afraid to layer.

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9. Demin or Leather, your choice!

10. Wear it under a dress, Change it up.

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The possibilities are endless. Do not be afraid to get creative. The end goal is to wear what works for you. You do not have to be rollin’ in dough to recreate the looks above. Look in your closet and start pairing items together.

Wear the unexpected, be extraordinary, be resourceful XO 

 

Disclaimer: All photos are not mine. Credit: Pinterest

 

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Dear Men, You’re Welcome!

This post is for all of the men out there who are completely clueless as to why your significant other hasn’t packed your lunch for work in the past few weeks. Take some notes boys!

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Women do not expect you to know it all, or to be able to get it all right. We understand that we aren’t the easiest group to deal with. However, we do ask that you try and use common sense. For those of you who can’t quite get it right, here’s a little cheat sheet.

  1. Ask her how day went. Sometimes all she wants is to talk to you, her best friend. She is not asking for your opinion or advice. Majority of the time the only thing she wants is to know that you are listening and that you care. This tool is also a great way to know what mood your partner could be in. Checking in throughout the day whether it is to say “thinking about you” or “hope you are having a great day, beautiful” is enough to put a smile on her face.
  2. Which brings me to the next thing, The little things DO matter. No matter how small a gesture is, she will appreciate it. A simple text message throughout the day keeps the line of communication going and let’s her know that she is on your mind. Say something to make her smile. Tell her she’s beautiful. pexels-photo-236287
  3. Compliment her. Women try our best to look good for you, their partner. Make her feel like the only person in the room. Every morning compliment her before she heads to work. It could be anything from her perfume, to how soft her skin is. Pay attention to details. Notice the changes she makes.
  4. Surprise her. It does not have to be anything Kanye West big, but flowers in the middle of the week just because. Bring her, her favorite candy bar or chocolate on your way home from work. Write a letter telling her how much she means to you. Kiss her on her forehead randomly. pexels-photo-399669Hold her hand in public. Take her to dinner or breakfast. Run her bath water so when she gets home, she can relax. Be creative, this does not have to require money, just pay attention to what she loves.
  5.  Lend a hand around the house. Sometimes it is extremely frustrating coming home to find a pile of dishes in the sink after a long tiresome day at work. We don’t expect you to do it everyday. But once a week or even twice could be extremely helpful. Cleaning up after yourself should not be much to ask for. Put your dirty clothes in the hamper instead of on the floor. Lets face it! You live there too.
  6. Play with her hair. Give her a massage before bed. Rub her feet. Hold her at night until she falls asleep.
  7. Appreciate her. Tell her how much she means to you. Let her know that she is appreciated for all that she does to make sure you are happy.
  8. Cook for her. This step does not have to be fancy. Coming home to dinner already made is a nice treat.
  9. Touch her. This one should be common sense. No one wants to be a piece of meat unless that’s what you guys are into. However, most women love to be seduced and treasured. Kiss her gently. Light some candles and set the mood. Add some music. Get creative. In other words think about something that means something to both of you whether it be a song, a scent, or piece of clothing that hold memories. Don’t be afraid to spice it up.
  10. Try something new with her. Adventures are never boring. You know your partner best. What are some things that she enjoys doing? Now find something in the area or out of town that incorporates her hobbies. pexels-photo-265878 Plan a day trip, a date night, a weekend getaway. Take her wine tasting or horseback riding. Go to a bar and act like strangers, then hit on her. Create excitement. Show her you want to explore the world with her. She’ll appreciate it.
  11. Listen to her. This is something I’m sure you hear all the time but it really can make or break a relationship. Listen to her when she vents about things that upsets her, makes her happy, that she likes or wants, her needs. A lot of the time when she speaks she is dropping hints.
  12. Be Consistent. As women get older we often want something secure. Something that makes us feel safe enough to take that leap. However it is very hard when the gestures men do in the beginning stops when things become official. Consistency is key. Do not and I mean it, DO NOT stop the sweet shit just because. It will never get old to her. Show her that you are still interested.
  13. Protect her. Women love to feel protected in every way imaginable. A sense of security feels great and it is very attractive. Show her that she never has to worry about anything as long as she is with you.
  14. Support her habits. If your partner loves getting her hair and nails done, take her. She enjoys feeling beautiful for herself and YOU.
  15. Make love to her mind. At a certain age, materialistic things mean little to nothing. Showering her with random pointless gifts will eventually mean nothing. Not to mention, she can buy it for herself if she really wants it. Go that extra mile and dig deeper to connect on another level.
  16. Fix her car. This just goes unsaid honestly. Fix the things around her that are falling apart that she doesn’t even realize. Be the Man of the house.
  17. Bring her coffee. Leave a note on her car. Remember its the little things. pexels-photo-248016
  18. Respect her. If you are in a relationship, the world should know. Period. No one has to know the details of your relationship, but put people in their place when they hit on you. Do not do anything to her that you need to lie about or hide. If it feels wrong, most likely it is. Never make her feel disrespected in any way. Respect her wishes. Do not talk bad about her to your friends.
  19. She’s your partner not your slave. Do not expect her to do every single thing for you while you sit there and do nothing.
  20. Stand by her side. Things will get hard at times, but don’t give up on her. Fight for her if you love her. pexels-photo-347988
  21. Say how you feel. This does not make you weak or emotional. It makes you a communicator. It helps her to understand you and how to improve being the best partner to you.

There you have it. Twenty-one ways to make her smile and pack your lunch. Of course this list helps when both parties are doing their part within the relationship. Guys, your partner knows her role and if she doesn’t, maybe you both should Reevaluate the relationship. Nothing is ever perfect but every little bit counts. Rome was not built in a day. Relationships take time and requires constant growth. Keep an open mind.

PS| Women don’t want a perfect man. Women want a trying man!

Dear Men, You’re Welcome XO

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The Ultimate Guide to Successfully Stick to your New Year’s Resolutions

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At the end of every year we all scramble to create a New Year’s resolution list that we think will make us a better person. By January 1st everyone is energized and ready to take on new challenges and simply become a better person. Although everyone’s goals are different in one way or the other, we all have something in common. That common factor is after the first two weeks we all give up. I vowed to myself this year to not let self doubt get in the way of progression. We all struggle with wanting to see results almost immediately and allowing ourselves to become dissatisfied. All this creates is frustration and lack of effort. Below I have created a list of ways to successfully stick to your resolutions. It is never too late to start! Just because you didn’t succeed in January or even february, does not mean to ditch those goals. Here is your Ultimate Guide:

First things first:

Mentally prepare yourself and get excited. Just like any research paper or anything you do, getting prepared and creating a plan is necessary.

Write down everything. Writing down your goals is key to getting started. We all have our goals embedded in our heads but writing it down forces you to think about it. Writing it down forces you to look at it every day which helps to keep that goal alive and attainable. Dream boards are also a great way to visually see your goals and to keep you motivated.

Select one goal and go for it. This is vital because the biggest mistake we often make is to take on more than we can handle. If you are anything like me, this is hard because there is a lot you want to do. However, the truth is we can only focus on one thing at a time. Select the goal that you want most, or the goal that is the foundation for your other goals. In other words, we often have goals that in order to achieve we must prepare for it.

Give yourself time to achieve each goal. This is the most crucial step because it is often the step most skipped. I like to give myself a “trial” period to get adjusted and to see if ultimately whatever the goal is, is right for me. A good trial period would be anywhere from one to three months depending on the goal. This allows you to get into a routine, make errors, perfect it, and put it into action. By the third month, you will start to see results and naturally make it a daily or weekly routine. At this point you are able to see if  whatever you set out to do was in fact the right decision for you. If it wasn’t, its okay because you tried it and successfully accomplished a goal. To be honest, three months is not that long of a time period. So don’t sketch yourself out if you think that is too long. It will fly by.

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During this time:

Stop self doubt. Period. It is toxic and in a world full of negative Nancy’s, you don’t need to add to it. Be your biggest fan.

Lets be real, if you don’t believe in yourself, why should others?

Surround yourself with like-minded people. THIS IS KEY. Studies have proven that people’s chance of succeeding is increased when around people reaching for the same or similar goals. It keeps you motivated and inspired. If you do not have anyone around you reaching for similar goals, or goals in general then use the internet. Get connected with people who have goals and who are on their way to achieving them. Linkedin is a great online tool to help with making connections. Another great tool that I use right from my phone is a app called Meetup. This app allows you to connect face to face with people in your area with the same interest as you. Totally safe and done on your own time.

Keep your eyes on the prize. It is very important to keep your eyes on the end goal. It is very easy to get distracted but don’t allow the self doubt to control you. Everyday you wake up, you are one step closer.

Use your time wisely. Time management is something we often struggle with because we underestimate the amount of time we have in a day. Sometimes we abuse the time we are given and waste it. Today the biggest thing we waste time on is social media. (NOTE: this is intended for those of us who use social media loosely) Studies have shown that in 2016, the average person spends a minimum of 118 minutes per day on social media. That is over 43,000 minutes per year that could be spent on doing something for YOU. Statistic.com shows the increase per year spent on social media. My tip is to use social media as a tool, as a platform to get you to your goals or to even help motivate you. Replace one hour everyday that would be spent browsing social media with reading a self help book, or doing something for yourself.

Ultimately:

Take and create new opportunities. During your trial period, seize all opportunities presented to you, or create them.

Before you know it, your New Year’s resolutions won’t seem so far fetched, but actually attainable. It takes patience and self discipline. These steps have worked for me and the results are extremely rewarding once you do what it is you have set out to achieve. It is never too late to start or to start over. It takes practice and dedication before it becomes second nature. Love yourself first and put yourself first. The rest will follow! XO

 

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