5 Things We All Struggle With

It’s no secret that being human comes with complications and serious shit majority of the time. Regardless of how old or young you are, mature or immature, wise or missing a few screws, we all struggle with things that often prevent us from progressing in the way that we should. Below I listed five major things that most people struggle with.

  1. Walking away from people or things. This one is massive in todays youth simply because walking away is hard. I struggle with this personally regardless of what it is that I need to walk away from, I hesitate or question my decision. The different instances in which most struggle with I have listed below (read what applies to you).

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  • Walking away from a relationship– This sucks for the simple fact you’ve invested so much time into building and getting to know a person and ultimately working towards being together. However just because you’ve spend a year or six months trying to figure out someone, does not require you to spend the rest of your days crying in the bathroom. Whenever a significant other makes you feel small or insignificant then it is time to do some evaluating. If a situation is toxic and no longer produce good results then it is time to walk away. Con’s and pro’s list (we all have one) should not define your relationship but if the con’s out weigh the good by far, ask yourself, “is this healthy?” Put yourself first in order to achieve best results. These results may not stem overnight but knowing that you value yourself enough becomes a bigger reward in the end.
  • Walking away from a job– Who doesn’t love money?! However, working at a job you absolutely despite causes more harm than good. It is absolutely impossible to put your best foot forward when you don’t love what you are waking up every morning to do. Whether it is the environment, coworkers, or your manager no amount of pep talks can help you fake a smile. Do yourself a favor and leave. Find a new job and be serious about it. Finding a good environment to be in is crucial simply because it is healthy to be in. We all struggle with landing the jobs that we really want, but have you honestly tried? Check out my previous post with some helpful tips on how to land that job here.
  • Walking away from a toxic friendship– It sucks when you realize the awful truth about a person whom you thought was your friend. After spending years or a few months revealing your most painful or embarrassing secrets, getting to know each other, and so fourth, it is sad when that person does not have your best interest at heart. We have all encountered that one “friend” who made you feel bad about yourself, embarrassed you, or simply isn’t there when you need them most. Ask yourself is this really worth the stress? A true friend adds to your life in more ways than one. Do not be afraid to evaluate the friendship and cut ties. A person like this usually won’t even notice when you distance yourself from them because of how self evolved they are. Be nice about it and never stoop to their level.

2. Being Happy. We always ask ourselves are we happy and more times than often the answer is no or maybe. What dictates happiness is often our shallowness and being hard on yourself. Just because you don’t own that Beemer yet does not mean you’re not happy. Ask yourself about the things you do have that you are grateful for. You may not have landed that dream job yet but you sure are on your way. Remind yourself of the opportunities you’ve been given and be happy. Happiness is not tangible and it should never be for the simple fact that anything tangible could be gone tomorrow.

3. Confidence. Every morning we wake up, look in the mirror and obsess over something about our bodies. STOP IT! Embrace the flaws you have or work on it. Stop comparing yourself to the Instagram model with one thousand likes because photoshop is a real thing. What makes you beautiful is confidence. Love yourself enough to know your worth and how beautiful you are.

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4. Learning how to handle stress. Stress is inevitable. When one thing goes wrong we panic and drive ourselves further into the deep end. Regardless of how big or small your situation is, stressing will not help you. Sit down and evaluate the situation first. Next think of solutions that are available to you. Ladies stress causes wrinkles!!! At the end of the day adulting comes with responsibilities that doesn’t always go as smooth as we would like, but stressing will not make it go away; a clear mind does.

5. Change. Who likes change? Most likely no one does and that’s okay. What’s not okay is not excepting the things that changes. Life evolves everyday and due to that, comes change no matter how big or small. The best way to handle change is to embrace it. Think about how much change and growth has helped you blossom into the amazing person you are today. Would you want to be five years old forever? Maybe we’d say yes to the part of having no responsibilities but realistically speaking, No! Struggling with change is harder for some people and I understand it is always easier said than done, but change is good and opportunities need change in order to prosper.

Of the list of things that people struggle with daily, I believe the listed are the most often overlooked. All you can do is continue to live the life you were meant to live one day at a time.

I want to know what struggles you face daily and how you’ve made it work for you!

 

 

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How Stella got her Sexy Back: 10 ways to feel Sexy

Feeling sexy is something a lot of women struggle with oddly enough. A lot of women live  life on a daily basis wondering how to feel sexy and feel ashamed to admit it. If you are a woman who cannot find your inner sexy, then this post is for you. Feeling sexy goes beyond what you see on the outside. It starts with confidence and killer eyebrows. Hey, good brows are a must ladies. The golden rule to feeling sexy is to make sure you are doing it for yourself first. When I sat down and decided to write this post, I surveyed a few women of all different cultures and backgrounds. I was curious to know, “What does sexy mean to you”. To my surprise, I discovered a lot of women don’t feel sexy and don’t know how to go about it. Then the other half shared a few tips on what made them feel sexy. Below I put together a list of ten ways to find your inner sexy and to feel sexy.

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  1. Having a glass of wine. Coming home after a long day of work, wine is the first thing most women crave. Wine relaxes you and quenches all desires. Sitting on your couch with a tall glass of wine with the lights dimmed allows you to focus on whats important, YOU. How could you not feel sexy sipping sensually on a cold glass of your favorite wine? Close your eyes and envision yourself somewhere magical or shacking up with the person of your dreams. After all, wine makes anything possible if you have enough. Am I right ladies?! people-summer-garden-sitting
  2. Good Music. Music often sets the tone for whatever the event. In this case, throw on some nice sensual music and let it take you away. Marvin Gaye has never failed me.
  3. Long warm baths or showers. Get inside the bathtub and let the warm water serenade you. Feeling clean makes you feel good and feeling good is what sexy is all about. Use your favorite bath bomb or shower gel and let the smell warm your soul. Finish up with body oil and your favorite fragrance. Smelling good makes you feel good by default.
  4. Exfoliate, Facials and Waxing. Removing all of the unwanted hairs and dead skin from your body will instantly make you feel unstoppable. Get a facial to clean shrink those pores. Remove those stubborn hairs that makes sleeping at night uncomfortable. Exfoliate the dead, dry, and rough skin away. Embrace the soft, and sun kissed glow your body will naturally have afterwards. You will thank yourself in the end. Trust me on this one ladies.
  5. Get your hair and nails done/ Do your makeup. The small things do matter. Taking care of your hair and nails will give you the confidence to shake that guys hand that you’ve been admiring for weeks. You will feel on top of the world with a new do and turn heads whether you notice it or not. Makeup whether a full face or just mascara leaves you feeling put together and alive inside. Admit it. IMG_2730
  6. Buy that lingerie you’ve been eyeballing. Buy it and wear it. Single or taken, wear it because you look fucking amazing in it. I was once told that the most important thing every woman should do is wear a good pair of underwear and bra even if you are running errands in a t-shirt and sweat pants. Wear it for you and you’ll be surprised how sexy you will feel. It is like a treat to yourself from you.
  7. Heels. A good pair of heels will take any boring outfit from cute to sexy. Heels allow you to stand tall, walk proud, and strut your stuff. Let’s not forget it elongates those legs.
  8. Working out. Whether you love working out or not, you feel unstoppable afterwards.
  9. Dancing. Whether you are at home in your pj’s or at the hottest club, dancing releases that inner sexy you did not know you had. Allow the music to take control and let your hair down. Dance the night away and don’t look back. workingout
  10. A good cleanse. Cleansing releases the toxins from your body and leaves you feeling lighter, cleaner, and full of good energy.

Keep in mind that feeling sexy is more than whats on the outside but more important, how you feel on the inside. Everyone’s definition of sexy varies but all have something in common: YOU. Change your definition of sexy if you feel that you are not sexy because that is simply not true.

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Own it, Believe it, Feel it. 

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How to Maximize Self Growth

What is self growth? Self growth in the plainest form is improvement. Self Growth is more important than you may think. Often times we forget what it means to grow. We think that because change is not happening at the rate that we want it to, that we aren’t progressing. WRONG! Growth happens everyday you wake up, whether tangible or not it’s happening.

Maximizing self growth starts with you and ends with you. Not sure where to start or how to even improve the things in your life? Below I have put together a list of things that you can all do to help with self growth.

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Be Self Aware. Be self aware of who you are as a individual. Once you are sure of yourself, no one can tell you any differently.

Know your worth. Once you figure out who you are as a person put it into action and know how valuable you are.

Believe in yourself. Let’s face it…if you don’t believe in yourself, no one else will. Proven fact. If you are self aware and you know your worth, fucking own it!

Put yourself first. Stop believing that putting yourself first is a act of selfishness because it is not. Do whatever it is that you need to do to succeed as long as you are doing it the right way.

Speak with conviction. Believe that what you say matters. Your opinions and your beliefs are valid.

Take Action. Take control of your life. You are the captain of your ship. Make it count.

Appreciate where you are in life today. Dwelling on “where” you think you should be in life helps nothing. Every step you take today is preparing you for where you are going in life.

Learn to be OK. Sometimes things in life will be out of your control and that is completely okay. Stressing over things that you cannot control helps no one. Learn how to make the best out of every situation or road block.

Stop holding onto whats not meant for you. It’s true, you can block what is truly meant for you by holding on to something you are suppose to let go of for many reasons.

Stop wasting your own valuable time. Time is too important to waste. Make every minute of your life count for something worth your wild.

Get out of your head. Overthinking kills.

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Be realistic. Do not sign yourself up for more than you can handle. This will result in you burning yourself out. Tackle your goals one step at a time. (Refer to my previous post   for more on goals here)

Keep your plans to yourself. No one needs to know what you have planned for yourself. Remember, not everyone is always happy for you. YOU DO NOT NEED THAT KIND OF NEGATIVITY IN YOUR LIFE!

Live within your means. That is a big one! It is okay to splurge a little but prioritize your funds. Putting yourself in a financial hole is the fastest way to send yourself spiraling backwards. That is not what you want.

Stay Organized. It helps when the things around you are together. This will keep you focused and cause less room for chaos.

Be patient grasshopper. Patience is a key factor in self growth. It takes time to improve the things in your life. Taking it one day at a time is truly important. Rushing things to fall into place causes you to bypass all the important learning factors. Do not cheat yourself.

Read and Research. Reading is fundamental. It keeps you sharp and it expands your mind, vocabulary, and provides you with an extended amount of knowledge. Researching gives you an advantage. It provides you with a glimpse of the things you want in life and allows you to see if it is something you really want. It also keeps you one step ahead and eliminates wasting your time.

Self Reflect. selfie-portrait-picture-photoWere you your best today? Did you maximize your time? Remaining honest with yourself is imperative. Self growth is about staying true to yourself therefore if you feel like today was not your best day, it is OK. Work on it and improve the next day.

Maximize the opportunities around you. If you see a door, go through it. Walking away from opportunities due to your own self doubt does more harm than good. Life is about taking risks and grabbing life by the balls.

Have a good attitude. Life is better when you’re smiling and let’s face it….you feel better. A good attitude keeps the energy positive.

Do not be afraid to stand out. No one else in the world is like you or capable of doing what you can. Let it be known. Stand apart and show the world what you’ve got. Standing out means you are not afraid to be different and creates opportunities for you effortlessly.

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Self growth stems from within and is something you need to do on your own. Each of the things listed above helps to create a better you. Changing your outlook on life changes the way you see the world and yourself in it. Maximizing self growth sets you up for success. Just because you cannot physically “hold” self growth does not mean it is not happening nor important.

Water your future.

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