Years ago dating was something that was taken seriously. Look at how long relationships actually lasted back then. The purpose of dating is to take the time to really get to know someone for who they are inside and out. Dating should be a time where you learn about who you are as person and what you want for yourself.
The standards for dating have tremendously taken a plunge in the wrong direction and continues to get worst. It is okay to have a list of things you want in a partner. It is not okay to not have a list. Knowing what you want eliminates the back and fourth, confusion, and headache.
The mindset that has taken over completely erases dating all together. People go from meeting to hooking up and then living together. What happened to the building a connection and learning the little things about a person? That is the problem and a huge factor why relationships fail today.
It is okay to fucking date ladies and gents. Get to know that badass person next to you before you dive in. Your time is extremely important and that needs to be something you remind yourself every day and night until you value it. Rushing into a relationship for the sake of having a “title” does neither of you any good.
Skipping the dating step causes chaos without realizing it at first. Months later you find yourself disgusted by the person you wake up next to because you didn’t take the time out to know their every flaw. Suddenly, you find yourself starting fights and trying to change that person. When you are in a relationship, that is not the time to decide you want to get to know that person. Dating is the step that gives you the chance to know a persons every detail if that’s what your end goal is. When you’re in a relationship, that should be the time where you are focused on uniting what you have learned about each other in the months before. Not vice versa.
Dating a person should take several months with no rush. Dating should be fun and exciting. Create desire for wanting to spend time together. Think of fun and new ways to get to know each other instead of “Netflix and chill”. That is not the proper way to get to know someone. Just because you have seen them undressed does not mean you are ready to spend eternity together. Do not jump into the world of dating if you are only looking for causal hookups. It’s not fair to the person you are stringing along if the end goal isn’t the same. Dating is where everything is put on the table such as end goals, wants, needs and desires. Adulting is stressful enough so why add complicated relationships to that mix?
It is okay date. Dating does not make you a prude, it makes you smart. The rewards are worth it and so is the trust that is built during that time. The foundation of a healthy, strong, long lasting relationship starts with dating.
Short cuts aren’t worth it if it takes you back to square one.